personal "prayer" from a book i'm reading (used by a woman wanting to overcome her hatred for some gossipy women in her office):

"i think, speak, and act lovingly, quietly, and peacfully. i now radiate love, peace, tolerance, and kindliness to all those who criticized me and gossiped about me. i anchor my thoughts on peace, harmony, and goodwill to all.

whenever i am about to react negatively, i say firmly to myself, 'i think, speak and act from the standpoint of the priciple of harmony, health, and peace within myself.' creative intelligence leads, rules, and guides me in all my ways."

i like it. it makes sense. i want to be kind to everyone. i want to find the good in everyone. om*G* is that hard! i'm trying though. i think its a great way to live. we are in charge of the energies/emotions we let foster within ourselves. if we don't let negative energies in, then i believe we are better off. i mean think about it. its essentially killing with kindness. it doesn't sound so new-agey when you put it that way, does it? disagree without being disagreeable and know that misery loves company. alright, i'll turn off the cliche machine gun for now.

can it really hurt to try and find the good in this twisted world? i mean what can it hurt to be nice to people even when they aren't nice to us? "niceness" has to start somewhere! sure, its going to be a humbling experience and very difficult for those of us who feel a desperate NEED to speak our mind and have our point/view understood, if not accepted by every last person in the entire world... BUT lets consider reality. i know from my experiences that very few people understand me even a little bit, yet i know i inadvertently strive for their acceptace.

tangent: whether you like it or not, i believe that everyone wants to be accepted to some degree. i am reminded of those t-shirts they used to sell at hot topic. they said: "you laugh at me because i'm different. i laugh at you because you're all the same." yea. oooook. those were produced in mass quantities. thus i feel it is an adequate example of how even the misunderstood seek to be understood by other misunderstood people. if you disagree, that's fine. i accept that and you are entitled to your opinion. =)

resuming thought: so if people are inevitably NOT going to understand you, why bother? why not just respect that they think differently? granted, this technique should probably not be applied to someone holding a gun to your head, for example. i think the best you can do in situations where the other person is just difficult (or perhaps irrational/mentally impaired) is to return good for evil. being evil right back is not going to get you anywhere - i had to learn THAT the hard way a MILLION times over, unfortunately i was always too stubborn to realize that my "standing up for myself" and using rational/common sense was getting me nowhere with people who could barely speak proper english. in retrospect, i could have been spared a great deal of touble had i merely respected those people's opinions - which in my mind were completely uncalled for and retarded (for lack of a better word), but were THEY ever going to understand that? no. not a chance in hell... or heaven... or even purgatory for that matter.

so i guess what i am trying to say is: don't just ACT kind, BE kind (rewind haha jk). if your kindness isn't genuine, others can pick up on it anyway. don't let negativity get to you - what good does it do? speak your mind, but do so with willingness to accept the fact that some people just don't get it and probably never will. you aren't always right, but that doesn't mean you are wrong. everyone is different and that's not necessarily their fault. its just who they are. don't let the evils of this world bring you down. you are in charge of what you think and the energies you let manifest within - you are in control. you CAN control your reactions. it may be hard, but isn't happiness and inner peace worth the effort? i think so. =)